The College Years as the name suggests is really just a compilation of notable songs recorded in college. For me, it was meant to solidify the concept I had started with Mermaid Street. Although, humorously, Mermaid Street is not even on the album in its final form. I was insistent on having the album start with a music box wind-up sound. I mic'd my unicorn music box and used it to set the mood for the album. At then end, I was to have an unplug sound...which at one point got put at the end of Blue. A former version of "The College Years" titled "Solar Powered Sorrow" was released a year earlier with Blue as the wrapup song. This ending still exists at the end of Blue in the B-sides collection...leaving Solar Powered Sorrow forever unfinished as I turned my attention to future efforts. The College Years -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Dreamless Nothing This song was written the summer my mom died, 2001. It represented my feelings at the time and my sense of disillusionment with the world. Dreamless Nothing appeared in my first 16mm film at NCSU. The film was titled Paradiso and it followed my friend Matt Ipock as he got dressed at the break of sunset and strolled through a beautiful rose garden. The song began as and two piece guitar riff called "Perty". Eternity Chaos -=-=-=-=-=-=-=- NCSU...Turlington Hall...2:00 p.m...annoying all neighbors. This song was about letting go and writing whatever appeared in the blank space of my mind. The title came from the film Julien Donkey Boy. This song is the first one where I mic'd the amp instead of recording directly to PC. It gave the sound a little more space to breathe. After this song, I moved almost solely to acoustic guitar and always mic'd the acoustic instead of using a direct line-in connection. ------------------------------------- We are all sadder than We want to believe Your summer star's falling down And you're still sad ------------------------------------- Car Crash -=-=-=-=- Barebones lyrics. Another soothsayer song to all those who are struggling with depression. Although it is outwardly pessimistic, it is meant to bring about healing through acceptance. Everyone dies. ------------------------------------- Safety pin yourself Till you can't feel anymore The less you know The more you believe When you wake up again You will be alone again Don't believe what they say Things will not work out somehow She might die in a fire She might die in a car crash It doesn't matter if you believe it Cause it will happen anyway ------------------------------------- Demo of Movement -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- I went through a real dry spell with lyrics and I had a lot of impulses to record instrumentals. For the most part, I resisted in search of something more tangible. I couldn't resist throwing this one in, almost as a representation of the majority of my non-lyrical musical inclinations. Silence -=-=-=-=- The lyrics wrote themselves. Keep in mind this was the same time period when I wrote Keychain. I remember going into open mics at the time having no ideas for what I was going to play. I refused to play most of the songs I had written up to the point. I had become obsessed with meaning but with a resistance to lyrics. I even remember thinking that any song with vocals should be considered "pop". Clearly, I got over my lyric-phobia and continued on... ------------------------------------- You laughed the day I sat in silence I lost my only friend that day Do you taste the morning Do you feel the rain Does anybody mean anything Throw out your diary No one cares Don't be afraid Silence is the way I know I'm not the same I can't talk to her Because of what you did to her I can't write to her Because of what you did If you were here I would talk If you were here I would write to you ------------------------------------- How to Follow Yourself -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=-=- Summer 2001. The title is actually just a combination of words that I saw on a few books at the library at ECU during my time working in the library mail room. It is overshadowed with a sarcastic minor ending. Angel -=-=-=- Angel began as a song called "Stuck in Rewind" with the lyrics: Everytime I watch my life go by Seems like I'm stuck in rewind It's like I'm frozen in time ---------------------------- I wrote the general riff idea during the summer of '01 and later that year at NCSU, it turned into Angel. This song also frequented Global Village and Americana open mic nights. It's kind of funny that I could never get a satisfactory-sounding version of this song recorded. I was using a system then that only lasted a few weeks where I had my Epiphone electric and a mic plugged into a splitter in the PC. The levels were impossible to get right at the time. Eventually, I settled for this bassier/whisperier version of the song. ------------------------------------- She was walking down to her house She was happy with her life She didn't want to go But angels fly away She was singing to herself When she smiled it was real She didn't want to go But angels fly away She left us here today Do you believe That your life is just a dream Did you know There are people who would die for you any day The world is empty now What more can I say Angels fly away ------------------------------------- -=-=-=-=-=- Thor's Song -=-=-=-=-=- This song, like many of my songs, actually wrote itself. When the song was forming, I remember thinking it had a universal message. As far as I can tell, it is for all of us who are afraid to accept ourselves. ------------------------------------- Instead of feeling fine You feel just sad Depression is a passing fad Everything looks dark With your glasses off When you look in the mirror You see your dad When you find yourself again Where will you go then It's yourself you can't escape It's yourself...no one else Just because you're breaking down Doesn't mean we will break too Someday you will see what I meant When I talked about life It's ups and it's downs and why not To linger too much ------------------------------------- -=-=-=-=-=- Supersmile -=-=-=-=-=- Supersmile was written in Greenville, NC during an interesting time period. For the most part, I was writing about the lack of a wider perspective in our society. It seemed to me that the root of the anger I saw in people came about as a a fundamental inability to see that we are all the same. I thought "Why can't we all just get along? We're all going to die anyway." That's supersmile...the bittersweet smile of accepting our ultimate destination. Supersmile, performed with Thor, won 1st place at NCSU's MusicFest in 2001. We received $150 cash. ------------------------------------- Snowflakes are falling You wouldn't believe And I'm just sitting here trying to breathe And I'm thinking this is great But I'm feeling nothing And I try And I try Try to believe What's the point of falling in love When all around me I see pain Well I've tried and I've failed Maybe I'm better off alone Can you hear me I'm screaming at the top of my lungs Have you changed Does it matter Don't we all end up the same Are you frowning How do you feel Do you have a supersmile Can you hear me I'm screaming at the top of my lungs Have you changed Does it matter Don't we all end up the same ------------------------------------- Dilemma of the lamp -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- During my time with the bass during Storm and Mermaid Street, I recorded this short instrumental. The song starts out pensively, but finds an assured rhythm and a hopeful ending. Stargazer -=-=-=-=- Recording Stargazer was a strange but vivid memory for me. It struck me to record a song with this theme and I quickly wrote some lyrics while recording. I spent so little time recording or playing the song that it remains quite mysterious to me. ------------------------------------- Stargazer, what do you see A fairytale dream Moonlit streets Stargazer, the moon is yours Put down your telescope Come with me Smell the plastic world Touch synthetic trees Don't bump your head on the sky Smile Goodbye ------------------------------------- Disappearance -=-=-=-=-=-=- This song was co-written with Thor and it began as a jam in D major. Eventually, all the parts came together and formed a rough outline of a song. Thor and I played Disappearance at Global Village and Americana numerous times. We convinced our friend Anna to play cello for the recording and to play at a couple open mic nights as well. This was recorded in 118 Turlington Hall. ------------------------------------- Not a day has gone by I didn't wish you were still alive The hardest part is to Find a way to live my life now ------------------------------------- Answering Machine -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Sort of a joke song. I tried to use it for my phone greeting in Turlington but it was too long. ------------------------------------- Sorry I'm not here to answer your phone call Please leave a message after the tone ------------------------------------- Keychain -=-=-=-=- I still haven't totally figured out this song. It wrote itself and I played it at a couple open mic nights. ------------------------------------- You forgot to return my keychain I know but I know where it is You forgot to return my phone call Life is hard enough as it is Don't throw your life away You are all I think about -------------------------------------